Saturday, June 5, 2010

wed-locked 31

UHH! I wanted to write more bs I needed more time to do that so I thought I'll just post what I have for now......:$

until next time :*

Previously on W E D - L O C K E D


girl "fyi ana hanan al X...a7mad al X's girl....yes i'm her...i can't believe lech wayh t6l3een jedam el 5alg after what u did..."

i was so pissed at her! so i stood up and answered back!

me " what the hell do u mean?"
girl "latsaween 3umrch baree2a....i know ur family lured his family into getting u two married just for the money...the money that's rightfully MINE!"
me "enti mn wain t2alfeen 8e9a9??stop judging people's life law sma7ty.."
girl "ma 2a2alef ur a BitCH and u know it."
me " what did u call me?"
girl "bitch."

I opened my mouth in anger and doubt then closed it. what the hell is wrong with her and how dare she...uf if i stay here one more minute i'll probably do to her something i'd regret later. I grabbed my bag bser3a and looked at fatooma who had a scared look on her face

me " fatooma ana baroo7 gabel ma i do to this Thing something i would regret! i need to go back home . BYE"

I marched out to the parking lot as her screaming accusations became lower and lower as i walked further away from her
I got into the car took a deep breath and got out of the parking....
My tears which I was trying to keep inside kept streaming on my vision started becoming unclear...

so did my mind...

everything was suddenly blurry....

I couldn't hear anything anymore.....

I couldn't feel my surroundings.....

everything suddenly turned pitch black.........


what's that sound....why do I feel so eyelids were so heavy to lift open....I fought through the pain and struggeled to open my eyes....blink by blink until I could almost see what was infront of me...which looked like a philipino lady wearing white..

lady " maaam.....maam can u hear me??"



I sat in the waiting area since the doctor galatlee atraya barra3
my heart racing and aching all at the same time
maybe I shouldn't have let her go out? is it my fault? I couldn't bare seeing her in this state...her arm all bandaged up and her head too.....weddi a3arf sho estwa feeha bs.....ana mt2akd she told me she had her license....i held my tears inside being a man.....
oho mat'thakar me being this sensitive uff what the hell is wrong with me...
I was the only one here in the men's waiting room...saraa and ro'9a's friend fatma were waiting on the other side fl woman's waiting room......
I got up paced until I saw the nurse coming to me informing me that my wife woke up....
I ran to her room not thinking about anything and as soon as I laid eyes on her my heart ached again...yarabiii what did she do to deserve this
r7t ylast 3dalha w i held her hand.....
she tried moving bs I noticed she cringed at the pain when she tried moving her hands...then she muttered something...

me "sho feech? tbain shay? may? e6lebi ely fe 5a6rich ro'9a w ana ayeebaa"
ro'9a "leave me alone.."

what? leave her alone? after all that worrying a7een i'll leave her alone?? 6ab3an la2! what's wrong with her!

i looked at her weirdly....

me "sho 8a9dich leave me alone?"

she looked at me bdoon nefs then she stared into the space jdamha...shakelha she was thinking....did she like loose her memory wla shay so now she doesn't know me fa tbani aroo7? ohooo ma3arf.....

ro'9a "what happened....?"
me "mmm u were in a car accident...the police told me lafaity 3ala wa7d or something...but it's ok i took care of it don't worry....."

her eyes were filled with pain....she looked at me in silence...for a bit

ro'9a ""
me "oh ....shar w ra7...bshtree '3airha 3adi..elmohem enti b5air ro'9aa "

she was quiet again...she looked at her wounds and explored them with care... tried moving them as she cringed through the ache that came with their movement....a tear escaped her eyes...
5ala9 magdar sho ha....i went closer to her w held her hand......

me " u need to rest ro'9a...don't move..."

she actually listened to me...closed her eyes and sighed....

ro'9a " stop..."
me "ha?"

she opened her eyes w 6ale3atni eb a resentful look

ro'9a "just stop it a7mad.."
me "ro'9a what are you saying..?"
ro'9a "stop being so nice TO ME!"

i let go of her hand...slowly...what is wrong with her?
tears started pouring out of her eyes....she tried closing her eyes holding them in...but that didn't work so well....
7beebty she couldn't even wipe her tears because her hands were all tied up..she moved her left hand which was less injured and struggled into ems7ing her tears....i brought my hands to her face w masa7t a tear.....she looked up at me pissed off

ro'9a "i told u to stop..."
me "ro'9a sho feech? Is it your hand?"
ro'9a "NO a7mad it is not my's u..."
me "me?"
ro'9a "yes a7mad i don't have to hide it anymore"
me "hide? what the hell are you talking about ro'9a!"
ro'9a " a7amd please stop acting stupid fatooma told me awal shay enna she 'heard' how people keep talking about how i ruined your plans of getting married to another woman and i got in the way bs ana glt laa .....akeed chatheb....making excuses for u......and then 7anan herself....."

I cringed at the sound of her name coming out of ro'9a's mouth....what the hell is going on?

ro'9a "she came up to me a7mad.......and confirmed the rumors.."

tears were coming out of her eyes..and her voice was shaky

ro'9a "she told me you wanted to get married to her...but then I came and ruined it for you two......w ana che yalsa clueless channi habla............and she's throwing words at me.... and...."

she was stuttering....I sat there in utter silence not knowing what to say to her....It was nothing like that at all.......

me "'9a it was nothing like that....w i told u ams my past is my past what I did back then doesn't matter anymore.."

ro'9a "do u know what all the girls call me a7mad? do u?"

I shook my head not knowing how to fix this.....I hate seeing her cry.....hate it.

ro'9a "SLut. yes that's what they call me...because no i can't go around telling everyone i was forced into marrying you so they think i seduced you and took you from if......"

me "but..."

ro'9a "but sho a7mad? u could have atleast gave me a heads up...bdal ma ana aseer che ignorant w adaf3 3annek jdam el nas.....I can't believe u.....I actually asked u......"

me "The marriage thing was all kalam fa'9ee bainy w bainha! I wasn't really going to do it....I never liked her that much'9a please......"

ro'9a "please what? a7mad......."

she said with a lower voice....still tearing

ro'9a "can you please call my mom...i need her.....please"

she bit her lip trapping a sob inside.....I nodded in obediance...Not only have I put her through physical pain but emotional pain WHAt the hell! ana w 7anan were nothing like me and ro'9a....I just was with her out of habbit......w kan so shallow I can't believe she's around telling people that...................yarabiii shol 7al?

I called her mom w told her about the accident she starting crying on the phone...w came rushing here....I sat on the side of the room 6ool hal'9a wanted some peace banedat 3yoonha and napped,or pretended to, for minutes until her family came rushing in.....

salamt 3alaihum w I watched ro'9a cry in her mom's lap....little did her mom know that those tears were caused by gave me an ache in the back of my stomach....i don't know what to do about it.......kill 7anan is not an option.....

i don't knoww... I just don't know.....

I can't bare seeing her like this......

it's all my fault



Crying in my mommy's lap sure made me feel better...I held her hand so tight and just cried....mskeena she thought I just missed her and was scared mn el accident I was crying more of humiliation....I hate people looking down on me.....A part of me knows it's not a7mad's fault......but I can't forgive him for not telling me...I mean why else would he hide it...he must still have feelings for her.....

mom " 7beebti hadii....ennshalla 5air.....elmohem enti b5aair...."
me "mamaa aba aroo7 el bait...3ndch......"

I could almost feel a7mad's stares piercing through me....especially when I said that....
mama just patted me on the back...telling me everything is going to be brothers and dad yLso barra3 after ma salemo 3alay baba gal byroo7 ys2al el doctor when they can release me....
this day was such a headache...y3ne could it be any worse?

i relaxed a bit my head on mama's shoulder...she signed and looked at a7mad

mom "a7mad wldiii seer erta7 mala da3i ettem bnrdha elbait 3ndk ..........7aram shaklek ta3ban wayd ! "
a7mad "laa laa 3amety........ana magdar ahed mrtii hnee w hee che...."

he looked at me giving me a soft smile...ana bs 3a6aita one glance and looked away......uf why is he still being so nice? it's getting on my nerves....
my dad barged into the room

dad "tawee kalamt el lazm ysawoom monitoring 7agch fa lazm etemeeen over night bachr el9b7 3ala 6ool tgdreen t6l3een bs lazm trta7ain wayd fl bait! "

I looked at him and sighed....i feel so tired i don't care anymore whatever they want to do with me...

a7mad " 3amty ...3amii... lata3boon 3markum ana batm wyaha w babat hnee..."

i could see a soft smile planting its way on mama's face...she liked a7mad a lot i could read it all over her face.....
baba ya basni 3ala rasii w gal he's going to come tomorrow to check on me bs 3nda sh'3L now w he said he's going to wait for mama barra3

me "mama mamaa please temmmii wyay please latroo7een! law sma7tyy 3shan 5a6rii mama..."

I said while my eyes were filled with tears and I could feel some tears escaping and streaming on my face...
mama mskeena she gave me a tight hug

mama " 7abeebty ro'9a...3adyy a7mad hnee weyaach"

she said still holding on to me...little did she know enna that was the reason i was crying...i didn't want to stay in the same room with him...maba......mabaaa..
i want to go back to when it was just me....and my complications....nothing

me " mabaa.....abach entiii..."
mama " samii billah ro'9a"

she said while loosening her hug...until she let go and looked at me with a concerned look as she wiped the tears of my face with her soft hands...

mama "yalla mama bshoofch bacher enshalla"

she got up kissed my forehead and left the room...I watched her as she left as closed the door behind her.. my eyes still fixed on where she was...I couldn't fight the tears anymore I started crying, although I did not want him to be here witnessing this..i don't want him to think i'm this weak and enna I need him or anything bs lel2asaf I was too weak....and deep deep down I knew that I did need him but i kept that emotion hidden behind the resentment I felt towards him now....with all my injuries even crying hurt more than usual...i could feel my body ache with every gasp of air I struggled to take.. the tears were suffocating me....
I could hear the sound of subtle footsteps behind my sobs...getting closer towards me until they stopped and he slowly and carefully sat beside me ...wrapping me in his arms forcibly , the warmth overwhelmed me i was not able to push him back or say anything I just continued crying while his warmth unfortunately comforted me... I closed my eyes letting the tears calm down... until I was able to speak again...

me " I haatee u..."

I said with a resentful tone as I held part of his shirt tight in my fist..

me "I hate u..."

I repeated while still being held in his arms.... he said nothing but I could tell he was startled by my words because he paused and was stiff for a minute but then continued stroking my back as if I had said nothing....
I was exhausted from the pain I couldn't take it anymore....
his warmth drove me to sleep ....

I struggled to open my eyes... my head felt better than earlier now, wow resting actually helps...I noticed that I was tucked in properly into the blanket w he wasn't near me anymore...fta7ti 3ainy w looked around until I found him...he had pulled the small sofa as close as he can to my bed while his two arms were folded under his head on the side of my bed...
he looked exhausted....a little part of me felt sorry for him and wanted to get up and tell him to come sleep beside me on the the majority of my brain was against
i noticed his phone was beside one of his hands
i picked it up in curiosity...opened his inbox bs makan fe shay....opened his calls w i noticed enna he had a miscall just an hour ago mn ra8am '3areeb....without hesitating I dialed the number and held the phone to my ears...




girl " Hallaa!.......7abeeebiii....i.."

I quickly closed the call before she could hear my it became faster......I could recognize that voice anywhere

it was was 7anan....

I threw his phone to its previous place in disgust....why did she call him? bs he didn't pick up ....oh bs maybe he was asleep mb enna he ignored her...........i hate her.....and him.....
his phone rang .....I looked over to see her number on the screen....he started moving so I closed my eyes not knowing how to look at him if our eyes meet so yes i pretended to be asleep......
i could hear him stretch and felt him pick his phone up

a7mad "uff"

all I could here were his footsteps moving away from me ....the door screeched open then a shut.....I opened my eyes and the room was empty......

ra7 yetti9iL feeha?

my stomach was twisting and twirling hurt......I've never gone through this before... what have I done to deserve this?
if seeing any other girl looking at a7mad is a pinch of jealousy...the situation now is a "someone threw me off a cliff" kind of jealousy....
ok yes I admit it i'm a jealous he's at fault too , this time atleast.....I have so much hurt inside me I don't think it's healthy

while I was in deep thought about my emotional and physical state the door of my room flew first I thought it was a7mad but the girly voices told me otherwise

sara "SHhhhhhhh She's aSLEEP SHWAY SHWAY! "
fatooma "oooopss sorry"

she said with a whisper...they both were too busy dealing with the door to actually turn their faces and notice that I'm actually awake

sara " WEEEE ro'9a DID WE WAke u uppp?"
me " laa laa... I was already awake "

I said with a weak smile....
fatooma rushed in and examined the cast on my arm then my foot....then looked at me with tears in her eyes

fatooma "does it hurt...??"
me "a little..."

I lied....

fatooma "7beebty ruuu you didn't deserve this I should have never let you leave! it's all my fault!"

tears started running down her face.....I reached my free hand to the other side and put it on her hand attempting to calm her down

me "la fatooma its not ur fault! 8addar allaho masha2a fa3al"

she looked at me with a sad frown as I shrugged my shoulder slightly....she calmed down at my sentence and sighed

fatooma "yah...I guess.....I'm glad you're kind of ok though..."
me "hehe"

I saw sara yawning while she was sitting at the side of the bed...then it hit me...what are they doing here???

me " wait a minute....what time is it??"

they both looked at me with guilty smiles

sara "mmmm about 3 am hehe"
me "what bs how are u guys here??"
sara "oh baba knows some people! he made some calls and TADA we stayed hehe we waited until a7mad left the room 3shan we sneak in to see u!!"

she said smiling ever so widely ...ktkoota sara...i don't care how much I hate a7mad I just love and adore saraa
I looked at fatooma....and raised one eyebrow...because I knew enna her family isn't that flexible

fatooma " I told them I was staying with you over night fl hospital stop looking at me like that!"
me "hehe"

those two kind of let my mind wander off away from the problems I was facing....thank god they were here...

fatooma "soo how iss ............mmm....."

she looked at sara then looked back at me... but sara's not stupid she knew what fatooma meant by that look ....any normal person would either walk out of the room giving us our privacy or let it la that's not how sara does it hehe

sara "hoooww is what?"

fatooma gave me a 'yikes' ana I was so relaxed about it

me "you mean how is who...."

fatooma opened her mouth at me.......the thing is I don't mind talking about a7mad in front of sara AT ALL.....

fatooma "isn't she his sister!"

she whispered at me...6b3an as I said before sara isn't dumb and she isn't deaf as well....

sara "a7mad?"

I just nodded to both of them

sara "what's wrong with him??"
me "mmm nothing's particularly wrong with him....per say....maybe his brain bs..."

i said resentfully

sara "weeeeeee r u guys fighting?"

I stared blankly for a second then sighed...

me "r u sure u want to hear this?"

I said calmly

fatooma "ro'9a! "
sara "la fatooma don't ro'9a her! i do want to knoow!"

she had her eyes wide open at me enna stop this

me "3adi fatooma....since everyone fe this frikin city y3arf doesn't she deserve to know too? "

I said with a frown as my voice slightly weakened towards the end of my sentence
her face relaxed w 7a6at her hand on mine looking down


i told her........everything that happened
all that happened yesterday leaving nothing out...she had her mouth open during most of the conversation... I wasn't sure about what that meant....
then when I finished talking she was silent for a few seconds


sara "but...."

she shifted her stare to me....

sara "he never talked about her....ever....r u sure its true?"

I nodded.......because when I talked to a7mad about it he didn't deny it he just said he never was going to marry her....I didn't know what to believe from him....

sara "but.......if he was going to marry her he would have argued with dad about marrying you...but he didn't..... at all......I even talked to him about marrying you and how he felt about it gabel..... and he said he didn't mind getting married "

she paused....her face was so serious...I've never seen her like this before what I said has bothered her's nice to see that she cares

sara "I just don't find it convincing....y3ne maydsh el ras...........besides i know that he's head over heels for u!"
me "I dunno sara....."

I fell silent after that thinking....then faj2a the door opens and a7mad walks in........
I looked at him then stared at the phone is his hands

a7mad "oh asef! maknt a3arf enna fe 7ad da5l"

he said when he saw that fatooma was here....he turned to go back out but...

sara " A7MAD! get back in here! now!"

me and fatooma opened our eyes wide at her! what was she trying to do??
he turned looking confused and walked in closing the door behind him

a7mad "yes sara?"